Watch Me Work

I first posted this image back in July of 2017 with the following caption:

The one who falls and gets back up is #stronger than one who has never fallen… I may be down now but I’m not out yet
Now #watchmework

Post from IG on Jul 29, 2017

Sitting here in Jan of 2022, I’m once again sitting on a floor, taking inventory of all that’s happened since COVID and measuring the setbacks against all my dreams. Yes, it’s depressing but the first part of my process is acknowledging where I fell short and why. This is the setup because the second part is more important. Noticing that I’ve fallen short slowly gets me agitated because I am not just my weaknesses. I am also my strengths.

It took me a long time to figure this process out. To sit with the depression for a while, to ruminate and explore all the reasons I’m failing (don’t have what I want) and learn to be honest about the “why” behind my behavior. In the beginning, being upset was a void, a tunnel with no light. I would take all of my energy and begin picking at the simple tasks I was failing to do and with every criticism, I fell deeper and deeper into my misery. This 1.0 version of reflection was very one sided though. Reflecting like this, I soon learned, would drag me through depression but if I stopped poking at my shortcomings long enough, I would naturally flip from sadness into anger.

Anger is a state I’ve created magic from before. To be so angry that I challenged people who judged me simply to prove them wrong. Where most people use anger and project it onto their environment to destroy, I would internalize and burn away as much of my weakness as possible by either learning to build that weak muscle or overpowering it with a different skill. Yes COVID was a gut punch, but the momentum I had inadvertently created before the pandemic hit was also remarkable. Before COVID, I was able to clear space in my life and set habits that allowed me the freedom to create and I had become a monster at creating content. This is part of the reason I joined medium.

Going forward I hope to share posts, both old and new, that have been created elsewhere as I celebrate my efforts to date. Documenting my infopreneurship journey, building a brand, rebranding, finding my tribe, losing my tribe, starting over and over — these are the pieces I want share with you. It doesn’t get more honest than this. So once again, 5 years after the original post, I find I’ve fallen but I’m becoming at pro at getting back up and restarting. Now Watch Me Work!

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I began with no end in mind and the path has been one of wonder and adventure. I'm far from done

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Rasath1

Rasath1

I began with no end in mind and the path has been one of wonder and adventure. I'm far from done

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